Responding to Family Violence

Section outline

• Select section Responding to Family Violence

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  Responding to Family Violence

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  Once family violence is recognised, knowing how to respond safely and appropriately is essential. This module introduces simple, beginner-level approaches to responding with empathy, respect, and awareness. It also highlights how to ensure a victim-survivor feels supported and empowered, without causing further harm or placing them at greater risk.

  • Select activity Objectives and Key Topics

    Objectives

    In this module, you will learn how to respond when someone tells you they are experiencing family violence. You will learn to:

    • Listen in a respectful and caring way
    • Speak kindly and without judgment
    • Help the person feel safe and supported
    • Know what to say and what not to say
    • Avoid making the situation worse or more dangerous

     

    Key Topics

    • The basics of a safe and supportive response
    • Responding without increasing risk
    • How to have a helpful conversation
    • Looking after yourself
    • Resources and referrals
• Select section Lecture

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  Lecture

  • Select activity Responding to family violence

• Select section The Basics of a Safe and Supportive Response

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  The Basics of a Safe and Supportive Response

  • Select activity When someone discloses family violence, how we res...

    When someone discloses family violence, how we respond can make a huge difference. A good response does not mean solving the problem or giving advice. It means listening, believing, and supporting the person with care.

    Key steps include:

    • Listen without judgment: Let the person speak in their own time and in their own words. Avoid interrupting or questioning their decisions.
    • Believe them: Believing a victim-survivor helps build trust and counters the shame and fear they may feel.
    • Validate their feelings: Say things like, "I'm sorry this is happening to you" or "You don't deserve this."
    • Reassure them it’s not their fault: Many people feel guilty or confused about the abuse. Remind them they are not to blame.
    • Avoid telling them what to do: Instead of giving advice, ask what they need and explore safe options together.
• Select section Safety First: Responding Without Increasing Risk

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  Safety First: Responding Without Increasing Risk

  • Select activity Safety must always come first—for the person exper...

    Safety must always come first—for the person experiencing violence and for you. Never confront the abuser or make promises you can’t keep. Avoid actions that could escalate the situation.

    Sometimes, offering help can put someone in more danger if the abuser finds out. Always be discreet, ask before taking action, and know that leaving an abusive situation can be one of the most dangerous times.

    To make this situation less dangerous, it is essential to support the person in creating a safety plan. This may include helping them think about when and how to leave safely, gathering important documents, setting up a secret signal or safe word, and identifying trusted people or places they can go.

    It's also important to respect their timing—some people may need to wait for the safest opportunity to act. Encourage them to contact a specialist service that can guide them through these steps and offer legal or housing support. Staying calm, patient, and available can help someone feel safer and more prepared as they make decisions about their next steps.

• Select section How to Have a Helpful Conversation

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  How to Have a Helpful Conversation

  • Select activity Responding to a disclosure can feel overwhelming, ...

    Responding to a disclosure can feel overwhelming, but simple phrases can show support.

    Examples include:

    "You’re not alone. I'm here for you."
    "There is support available if you want it."
    "You’re very brave for telling me."
    "Can I help you find someone to talk to, like a support service or counsellor?"

    If you’re unsure what to say, focus on kindness and safety. You don’t need to have all the answers.

    <Handun and I will do a short video here>

• Select section Looking After Yourself

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  Looking After Yourself

  • Select activity Hearing about family violence can be upsetting. It...

    Hearing about family violence can be upsetting. It’s normal to feel sad, angry, or unsure. If you’re supporting someone through this, you might also need support.

    Talking to a professional or supervisor, or accessing debriefing services, can help you continue to support others in a healthy way.

• Select section Resources and Referrals

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  Resources and Referrals

  • Select activity It's important to know where to refer someone for ...

    It's important to know where to refer someone for expert help. In Australia, key services include:

    You can also look for culturally appropriate, disability-aware, or LGBTQIA+ inclusive services, depending on the person’s needs.

    Organisation	Nature of the service provided	Contact details
    If someone is in immediate danger	Emergency services	000
    Respect (Safe Steps in Victoria)	24-hour service for family violence	Web: https://www.1800respect.org.au/ Phone: 1800 737 732 Email: safesteps@safesteps.org.au
    Safe Steps	24 hours a day, 7 days a week, for women and children who are victims of family violence. Victoria’s 24/7 family violence response centre.	Web: https://www.safesteps.org.au/ Phone: 1800 015 188
    Multicultural Centre for Women’s Health (MCWH)	A voice for migrant and refugee women’s wellbeing in Australia.	Web: https://www.mcwh.com.au/ Phone: 0394180999; 1800 656 421
    Victoria Police	Violence against women and children.	Web: https://www.police.vic.gov.au/family-violence Phone: 000 in an emergency or Contact your local police station
    Our Watch	Primary prevention of violence against women and their children in Australia. Learn about violence against women and how to prevent violence against women. Gender stereotypes and men and masculinities.	Web: https://www.ourwatch.org.au/contact/
    inTouch	Multicultural centre against family violence inTouch provides services, programs and responses to family violence in migrant and refugee communities.	Web: https://intouch.org.au/ Phone: If you are experiencing abuse and need a translator, call TIS on 131 450 and ask them to call 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732, or Safe Steps on 1800 015 188. Both services are open 24 hours. Phone: For general information and enquiries phone inTouch on 03 9413 6500. Email: communications@intouch.org.au intouch men: mfc@intouch.org.au.
    cohealth	Family violence counselling	Web: https://www.cohealth.org.au/ Find your location: https://www.cohealth.org.au/location/
    The Orange Door	The Orange Door provides help for people experiencing family violence, or who need assistance with the care and wellbeing of children and young people.	Web: https://www.orangedoor.vic.gov.au/ 000 or the contact phone number depends on the suburb. Find your location: Can find the service near you by visiting: https://www.orangedoor.vic.gov.au/find-a-service-near-you
    Rainbow Door	Family violence support for LGBTQIA+ Connecting all LGBTIQA+ people to the services we need.	Web: https://www.rainbowdoor.org.au/ Phone: 1800 729 367
    Men’s Referral Service	For people at risk of using family violence.	Web: https://ntv.org.au/mrs/ Phone: 1300 766 491
    MensLine Australia	A telephone and online counselling service for men with family and relationship concerns.	Web: https://mensline.org.au/ Phone: 1300 78 99 78
    Man Cave	Emotional intelligence for young men.	Web: https://themancave.life/ Contact through the web-portal: https://themancave.life/contact/
    White Ribbon	The White Ribbon Campaign is a global movement of men and boys working to end male violence against women and girls.	Web: https://www.whiteribbon.org.au/ Phone: 1800 737 732
    Safe and Equal	Safe and Equal works with practitioners and leaders to bring grassroots issues into the public policy arena, coordinate and participate in advocacy and action to reform policy and improve the service system, and scale up and embed practice development and innovation across the continuum from primary prevention to recovery.	Web: https://safeandequal.org.au/ Phone: 03 83465200

• Select section Responding to Domestic Violence presented by Rosie Batty

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  Responding to Domestic Violence presented by Rosie Batty

  • Select activity https://youtu.be/1QN-_RyAxBs

• Select section 5 Powerful Ways to Talk to Someone Experiencing Domestic Violence | MedCircle

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  5 Powerful Ways to Talk to Someone Experiencing Domestic Violence | MedCircle

  • Select activity https://youtu.be/kx4vHQ-p91w

• Select section How bystanders can help someone experiencing domestic or family violence

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  How bystanders can help someone experiencing domestic or family violence

  • Select activity https://youtu.be/HJBrnOWfnTg

• Select section Reflective Questions

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  Reflective Questions

  • Select activity How can your response make someone feel more or le...

    • How can your response make someone feel more or less safe when they disclose abuse?
    • What are some helpful things you could say to someone who tells you they’re experiencing family violence?
    • Why is it important not to pressure someone to leave before they are ready?
       
      <Video from Handun and Me>